descention from delerium

Sitting with felicity, kissing her on the cheek.
...and then i blinked.
It was as if bliss had been blown to splinters,
dissolved like a vapor in the wind.
To the depths i descend with my face in my hands.
The heart on my sleeve makes my left wrist bleed.
The flowing slows my breathing,
and the beating starts receding.
Please releive this pain so i no longer feel a thing.
Give me hope to believe in.
Let me leave my grieving behind,
so i can find whats left
of whats real again

Love is a Lie

Turn toward the gallows
Now say a prayer
Weep as you wallow
In sheer despair
This life is shallow
The well is dry
This heart is hollow
Love is a lie
You chose to follow
Snakes to their snares
And fell to sorrow
What do I care?
This time is borrowed
Word from the wise.
We live tomorrow
Simply to die

eternal dawn

These nights are longer than the days
I long for summer's loving gaze
Her shoulders supporting my arm's embrace...
Lest my heart begin to race
And I forget the words to say
I know in my heart it'll be okay.
For the sunset' blaze,
And its majestic rays
Depict the splendor in every way...

life before birth

i rise from the ashes only to fall back down. i build houses of glass with wax in place of plaster. its almost like im asking for disaster! i must become faster than the sorrows chasing after me.. adapt, outrun, outlive, outlast. im a master of passion, it burns like an effigy. the fire in my eyes is hot enough to melt the skies. the inferno in my heart burns all her memories from my life, cutting them out like a knife. the hour the bonds were sliced i ceased to live and began to exist. she says i did this to myself! Calling out for help, searching for a sign.. we live and we die and we keep our hopes up to the skies. We shall take no compromise, only that which exists for our eyes can be seen, only that which appears as sound can be heard as we feel the meaning behind the words and become one with the rhythm of a life before birth

Waxlit Serenade

i aint never crashed so hard
never fallen down this far
i just wanted to be a star
the sunshine inside you heart
like leaves we were blown apart
a tradgedy from the start
we took a stab in the dark
look where it got us
it brought us nothin but jagged cut scars
they think im sick cuz i call it art
i wrote this to show
my life aint no walk in the park
sometimes it gets hard
and so i play the guitar
and sing a song by the rhythm
of your beautiful heart

I’ll never forget your hazel eyes
That blinded my sight with your haze of lies.
Now that I see I’ve been victimized
And my trust in you has been compromised
I regret my transgressions
My heart’s crystallized!
Tears fail to fall for my pores have been tied
And my veins are so mangled
By your fateful demise
I couldnt believe
that my lover would lie
Making me wish to end my life
My faith in you has turned to knives,
Cutting you out from my empty insides.

Passion Without Love

I know this will be painful,
So no need to feed me lies
By trying to tell me otherwise.
I can already feel
The surgical steel
Needle break the skin,
Piercing the heart that lies within.
Ensnared by obsession,
The expedition begins.
Her velvet temptation...
Inviting me in.
I've said it before
Now i won't say it again.
I've become more alone than I've ever been

Douloureux L'amour

There’s not enough air in the space between us…
I’m lost in her eyes playing Russian roulette
But ill pull and pull till its fully empty
Empty as the cavity she infested my chest with
Meaningless as my life without her
Worthless blood running down my wrists
Gets on my chest as I clutch my heart
Just say the words, I’ll disappear
Departing with fire on my tongue
Becoming lifeless, last breath leaves my lungs
She sings the same song that I sang in the shower
As she breaks down and drowns in my sorrow for hours
My corpse held to her, like a bouquet of flowers
What I once loved in life...
In death, I’ll devour.

Through Fire's Light (revised)

Pondering down this desolate lane,
where lonely beings cast their empty stares.
Half a night spent wandering through the rain
waiting, listening, breathing spring's air.
Gripping tight to this we know.
The truest, purest moments within the tatters of our lives..
What a scene! Oh, what a sight!
If only she could've been there that night...
The world eclipsed in fire and beauty.
Burning and blossoming in resting stillness.
A phoenix flower frozen in the sky.
So peaceful and so bright,
warm shades of heavenly light
that touch my soul and remind me of her,
making my heart skip like stones along the glistening shore
No beauty in the world will ever compare
to the loving in her smile or the knowing in her voice.
The passion in her eyes like twinkling stars.
locked inside a memory of hours spent with her.
So by day, by night, may we find one another...
Through fire's comforting light.

Indecency

Blame it on me.
Just lay it all down on the table before me.
Spill your blood and call it treachery...
Committing lechery,
Yes you heard me perfectly.
You lust for the ability,
to instill catastrophe
By dealing indecency in secrecy
Behind the scenery
completely discreetly.
Close your eyes so I can...
*slice* *slice*
Now I’ll come quietly.
Don't think twice just bury me whether I’m dead or alive.
I'm just another casualty lost to your deceit.
Breathing so carefree and casually with graceful ease,
You kill me skillfully, so effortlessly carefully it’s almost scary...
With my last breath I start to detest you,
Rejecting wholeheartedly the way you started making me.
This time I will not retreat,
No never again admit defeat!

Drowning in Fire

Love is like drowning in an ocean of fire.
your last resort when you're down to the wire.
Pain is the lie she tells your friends behind your back;
and agony lacks sympathy for anyone who's just like you.
Hope is the last burning ember in the ashes.
The box of her letters i used to practice striking matches.
The passion she wrote has been soaked in gasoline.
The tremors from the aftermath of ashleigh,
and december's ninth symphony was simply a scratch
in drastic contrast to her knife in my back.
Thrashing out in anguish, the angel's the liar!
She's too selfish to save me from drowning in fire...

Sleep Walking

The memory of her embrace
Reaching out to stroke my face
Like a diamond blade cutting through the smoke
Night air rolls over the edge like mist
lingering amongst a field of stones
The echoes of her haunting voice
Wash over me like waterfalls
Left alone to dwell in agony and remorse
I lurk in the shadow of the absence she left behind
Dreaming of her crooked smile
as i walk through the dimness of moonlit streets
Meandering through alleys of breathlessness and doubt
Consumed by a loneliness, redefined.
A heart longing to love like fire
With a passion smoldering in my chest
and a sorrow embedded in the pit of my soul
A cinder of hope burning ever so faintly
Behind the eyes she once so loved...
The eyes that love her so strongly still
Ever so sane,
With endeavor so ill...

Dwelling in Yesterday

Cut from redemption
as i fall from the sky
My sense of reality
has moments left
before it dies
The empty space beneath my eyes...
...and in my heart, is stained with lies
The apathy that I am shown
By those who are fulfilled is prone
to make me want to self destruct.
Bury the blade into my arms
Comfort is found for the crimson is warm
Approaching nervana, the numbness sets in
Two entities fall to the ground...
Snow descending all around...
Grief aparrent by the scars on their wrists...
with "I love you"...
etched into...
the frost on their lips.

State of Mind

A sense of sensation
as i strive for innocence
and try for excellence
in the eyes of reflection.
My mind is dripping from the ceiling,
But I'll get through this one (God willing)...
I can't kill this awful feeling
Disease dwelling in my chest
Jagged lines upon my
wrist
Soft
criss
cross
cuts into the FLESH!!!
stop...
...Acting like you care about me!
Take away your apathy,
Just crucify and bury me
Place the corpse, no longer mine...
Six feet below the sands of time
Watch the sickness of sheer insanity...
become a state of mind

The illusion of Elusion

Sit still
As you hold me close...
Breathe through your mouth,
And out your nose...
Drown all the sounds of lonely silence
With the tremors of our beating hearts
Breaking down as we depart
Feel the light shone through the darkness
Your eyes reflect the heaven's stardust
Making my soul feel marvelous
Glorified in the voiceless ambience
of a rebelious wayward drive
beneath dark skies
two pairs of crystal eyes
that fade away
as evening dies
Two sincere sets of scarlet lips,
whisper decay as dawn arrives

Silhouette in the Frame

Two lonely hearts inside the door..
Ignited in devotion's eyes..
A lone, untainted silhouette..
The assassin in disguise.
Your cloak and dagger, all the same..
Your cold, white lies they shall remain...
These clueless, careless, reckless flames..
Dancing, flickering, in the rain.
One broken soul that longs for more,
who desires to love until it's sore..
Like the burning embers of a dying fire,
their hearts ablaze behind the door

Fire and Frost

I always loved her,
never let it show..
Afraid to lose everything
by never letting go..
Now everything is missing,
It's some place i don't know.
Perish the thought She's out in the cold,
lost without somewhere to call home..
The inevitable's calling,
carrying woe..
Bringing desolation to all of those...
Whose tears have no place left to fall,
on which they haven't already soaked.
A burden from our eyes,
we drown the world..
They fall, glossy-eyed, into gasoline.
Let your fires die,
set your grudges free..
Let the world have one last beautiful dream...
Before you lift a shaking finger,
to pull a jagged, hair-pin trigger.
The smoke and mirrors burn to cinders...
As they deal the impending fate that lingers.

Cemetery Slaughter (or so legends say)

You can hear me,
but you won't see me..
Feel my presence,
entoxicate your senses.
Blood rushing,
painting the fences
you use for all your best defenses.
A heightened sense of fear you feel,
as i draw ever nearer through the shadows before you..
The screams are welling,
coiling inside you..
Your legs are knotted,
trembling,
RUNNING!
But you're not moving,
just wallowing in panic;
with breaths as short as a one-night-stand.
The air..
Stops..
TIGHTer and
TIGHTer your stomach knots!
stiffer and stiffer grows the hair on your neck,
as TENSE and TENSE
grows the stillness that binds you in cast-iron chains.
a SWISSHH!! a FLIkk.. a.. SNAP-FLASH-TWIST-GASH!!!
Flexing my gums down upon your neck!
Popping the cork off your bloody champagne.
Sweetly shrieks spray the scene with red,
painting your face with horror and dread!
Cutting, tearing, ripping flesh!
She falls to the ground...
Like a mangled rose.
Trampled and alone.
Breathing...
Even...
Slower than slow.
Still breathing nonetheless...

Falling Forward in the grand scheme of things

A love like summer in a scene that says it all..
The only words we need to hear are the echoes of our dreams.
Gliding acrossed the floor like lip gloss in the mirror..
Falling toward the door,
but God knows not in fear..
a restless, everlasting silence in a timeless autumn clearing..
our hearts romancing what a life-time spent apart could not diminish..
a whisper in my hand, i hold up in my open palm..
brushing it acrossed your cheek as i take in your sweet serenity..
the fibrous tendrils of a life worth dying for.
the low resounding melody of an angel worth living for..
for the unspoken joys have already played their part in the life of a girl worth falling for..
may the true pleasures of life
be those that fill our hearts with the sounds
of what we've always been waiting for...

alleged self-sympathy

Paste the sand back into glass...
Stare at me through it and tell me who I am.
This is a lifetime...
You took away
My innermost feelings cascading down the drain.
Your hands tremble as your heart . .
skips . .
stops . .
tick, tock . .
tick, tick, tick!!!
six-hundred-sixty-six stitches can't fix this!
Can't cure the sickness! . .
dwelling in my wrists.
Clouded eyes like blood-shot slits
Your attempts at ammends are all in vane!
As the sky pours blood and it starts to rain
I'm there with an umbrella throwing roses on your grave.
She spent a life-time trying . .
to no avail . .
All the while dying,
not to fail
in life
but to live to the fullest.
Taking one last stride to full-fill ME!!!
Tripping . .
tumbling . .
into her grave.
Upon her . .
merry . .
little way.