If and When

Sitting on a black throne
Bleeding in a corner
A steel blade
An hourglass
Decay speaks in a monotone
Torture tossed her last goodbye
Through my open
Bedroom door
The lies that have been sewn right through
Occurring even…
More and MORE!
The beauty and her shadow, grey,
The jealousy, the cries in vain!
You never thought I tried!
To tell you…
So then you had to die!
I hate you…
The wailing wind outside!
The window…
Screaming to the night!
Calling you…
Was really my desire to show you…
The broken part I died to give you…
A slashed-to-ribbons memory…
Of lying next to you.

Tradgedy's Farewell Song

I stand by what I said before.
Inhaling the sweet perfume she wore.
Breathing in a whisper. . .
Ingested by her ears I pour. . .
By moonlit beach and stardust shore
Writing the faintest murmur on the deviding void
The air upon eagle's wings we soar.
She stands by what she said before
She wanted this night to mean
something more.
She loves the beauty I so adore
Embrace these lips
This heart is yours
Stricken speechless. . .
My throat is sore
And so I stand by what I said before
I said, "I love you"
Just as forever
and ever I shall
Just as always
and evermore. . .

Dearest Ashes

Staring in awe. . .
Eyes fatigued
My soul bare, and raw
Waiting to bleed
Anticipating pain
and distant screams
of distant broken memories
The shattered moon weaps
on a candlelit december's eve. . .
Driving down this one-way street
In a city that never sleeps
Staring, and listening
in disbelief
Her tongue translating
a world of mystery
Lifting her walls
Showing what lies beneath
An abyss of stars
and one single silver streak
The wind whispers my name
into her ear
It was love's deceit
Which made it hard to believe. . .
That she could simply,
Just disappear

as I lay me simply to rest my head

Her face is the picturesque eternity in which I bleed
Her eyes I see
Are that which burn my throat with thoughts unspeakable,
splitting my lips as I curse the night
in a masquerade of frustration uncontained by my unforgivable soul.
her beauty of which I speak is the sunset on the autumn's eve.
This monologue is the product of enfatuation, lust, and greed.
Once I have explained. . .
I always fall.
Too damn sad.
She is the world tonight in the iris of summer's eyes.
None can fathom.
None shall comprehend what I desire;
for that is death,
and tonight the world shall weep over another lamb lead to the slaughter
on the chopping block of content.
She is the world tonight in the Iris of summer's eyes.
Tonight the world shall cry
as I take one last look in her venemous eyes,
hold my breath,
lay down and die.

Still Speechless. . .

Sitting in her shadow
Cursing under my breath
Laying down, upon the ground sobbing. . .
I’m under the impression you were busy
Which is why you’ve stopped talking
You’re my rainy day
You’re my pain
My tears
My guilty shame
You’re my overcast day
I’ve lost my map
I’ve lost my way
I’m still speechless
I’m still searching. . .
You were the everything inside
My darkened silver moonlit night
One last breath,
One last December ninth
And the only answer I ever needed
Was, “You don’t have to say anything”
I’m still speechless. . .
I’m still crying. . .
Ever since the following day.

Afraid

Teardrops, misery, and lies.
Beads of cold sweat. . .
Running down my neck.
Maybe I'm scared that you'll do it again.
It's not your presence alone. . .
But your essence as well.
This feeling I get
Like falling forward
Every time I see your eyes. . .
Teardrops, misery, and lies
Not because it wasn't beautiful.
Not because it didn't mean the world to me.
Not because you didn't break my heart. . .
It's because I'm afraid! ! ! !
That you'll do it again. . .

Vacancy

As the anger fades
As the fury dies
The heart slows
The pen flies
Acrossed this page
Constructing plots
Making plans.
Along the darkened
Thin red lines
Is where the misunderstanding
The giving up
The giving in makes its mark.
Taking unproductive strolls
Through tunnels of frustration
Say my name. Call for me down dim lit streets
And empty halls
Watch my head not turn
Watch me stop and buckle at my knees
Sobbing and crying as I hit the floor
Watch the pain, the fallen, suffocating heart.
Stop and stare
Turn your back
You cannot bear
To even breathe the same damn air. . . .
As the pale, black haired boy
With the very heart that you destroyed.

By the Swingset

Let this be. . .
The love letter that breaks your heart.
Inside of me. . .
That night meant treachery.
We filled our minds with angelic voices
Protesting and wailing
Their siren's song
She's transfixed.
My ears,
My mind,
My eyes are closed.
Afterward we walk. . .
Breathing in december's night
Headed toward the coffee shop
After still, and still we drive
Into the depths of black crystal sky
Splintered into crystaline grains of purest white light.
In her car. . .
Down by the park. . .
Sitting here. . .
Hand in hand.
arm in arm. . .
Kissing. . .
Kissing. . .
By the swingset.
The love lost forever, the forever in a night.
Hidden in her whisper.
Lost in her lies
She breaks my heart.
In her arms
Between her lips, as we're. . .
Kissing. . .
Kissing. . .
By the swingset.

Harmful if Swallowed

Love is an entity.
Ripping through our hearts.
As it passes through
a restless blade
soaked in morphine so we wont feel pain
as it breaks down our defenses,
as it comes through slower and slower still with graceful ease;
With movement as smooth as a razor’s edge.
Sliding through at an even pace,
catching on every last barbed black thorn.
Ripping through the tissue,
poisoning the flesh like lies poison the soul.
Severing the muscle to make us weak,
serrating the spine as it leaves through the back.
This wretched blade of love. . .
is a simple phrase.
"I love you."
spoken through the lips,
consumed when they embrace,
bent back as they retrace their steps.
It's just another wasted breath.
Time will tell. . .
The blade, and the pendulum.
Back and forth and back again.
Conversing it's dark romance in the language of broken dreams;
Channeling vines of barbed wire through me.
Ripping through. . .
Tearing acrossed. . .
Whipping
Lashing
Breaking
Smashing
Blinking
Flashing
The fakest vicious grin. . .
The world has ever seen!

Sunset

Serching for answers
like why am I such a pesimest?
I'm always so lonely
So down and depressed
She feels so far away hence this hole in my chest
Angelic fire beams rising from the heaven's crest
Her beautifully blinding face setting in the west
For whom my love remains bottled up and compressed
Maybe I'm obsessed
Or perhaps just impressed
By the sheer love which I have never known
Not until the day she came and took all my breath
With a whisper, so gentle. So faint, the sound
Of her voice on the wings of the breeze
Betwixt the blink of her lash.
Covering momentarily what lie fixed upon
The face of the one in whom her undying love dwells.
The inseparable intertwining of spirits unending. . .
Outlasting. . .
Even death.
Let us speak this Godly melody from tongues cast by our very breath.
Cast into gold
and vermillion sunset.

Death Wish

I’m just a shadow.
Just a glorified statue of shade
With a voice that no one listens to
A daily dose of fear and sadness
To keep the anger away
The hate welling up
Behind my dark red walls
But I won’t listen
I’m too preoccupied with love
To give in to the hate
I fear not death
I have nothing to lose
I won’t be subject to her
And the wicked cruelty
with which she broke my heart
I love her with a passion
Burning brighter that these stars
So much louder than these lies
I am judged with day by day
I hate myself for trying
But failing
To hate her for making me wish I was dead
As the ice ridden winds
Slap my frost bitten face
Kiss me, save me
Love and embrace me
Take me,
So far away
And we’ll leave this place.

The Dream

Written by matt, Inspired by catie

Tranquility holds this place
In the palm of her hand
If sadness isn’t derived from haste,
Well, I’ll be damned
Let’s watch the stars.
Let’s stare beauty in the face.
We’ll bend back these iron bars
Cut through ropes and chains
The moon contrasts with a sky of jet black
Littered with splinters of light
A blazing, pale, blue crescent
Burning like fire
The crickets sing in harmonic choir
More beautiful is she who sits beside me in this place
Than the lovliest of a mid-summer night’s dream
For her I breathe. . . .
My whispered promise
“I’ll never leave”
“I’ll always be here”
Behind her loving eyes
She has nothing to fear
We’ll never die
The moon is the only thing
Between us and the stars
That shine in the distance
Like glowing memories
Just listen to my heart strings play
A lovely melody to make things right
Our lips embrace like long forgotten friends
Once lost, now found by this
Wonderful. . . .
Memorable. . . .
Night.
Fade to black over the crystal blue waters
by the black sand beach
Reflecting the midnight abound within her eyes
Drift awake with tears in the same
All splendor that came
Now gone
For this was simply just a dream

tastes like lies

Stab in the back sealed with a kiss
The truth spelled out in blood on my wrist.
I’m falling forward into the abyss
More will only give you less
I love the hatred. The snakes, they hiss
Chase this all away with your simple kiss
You want my reasons? I’ll send you the list
You’ll trip and fall, you’ll aim and miss
What a grave mistake. You took a risk
Your beauty.
I could not resist
You are the one true optimist
I’ll be your faithful pessimist
You’re my light that shines in darkness
You’ve deserted me, I deserve better than this!

Careful what you wish for

I guess you’ll just have to teach me a thing or two
And I’ll keep on learning
The hardest way there is.

Saying goodbye is the hardest part
Goodbye
Goodbye
Goodbye

I wish so many things
But every thing is worthless in comparison to this
I need, I want, I love you. . . .
I’m dying for what I can’t have
I swear I’ll die without you
So here I am. Stab me in the back.

I’ve said goodbye far too many times
Goodbye to my heart
Goodbye to my soul
Goodbye
Goodbye
Goodnight

My breath’s becoming shorter
Just tell me you love me one more time
Before I take my last
Be careful what you wish for
For what you wish for might come true
I wish I was dead and now your sky’s fading form blue. . . .
To scarlet red
You swear your
Chest’s full of lead but it’s all just in your head

So this is my appology and here’s my goodbye
Pretty quick but not so painless
Goodbye
Goodbye
Goodbye
And Goodnight.

Be careful what you wish for
Careful about what you love
Be careful what you wish for
You might wish you were dead
How Ironic then
That’s what you are to me.

Complications

You left
Me all
Alone. . . .

I could’ve swore your heart was
Made
Of
Stone

But I guess you needed someone
You
Could
Use

You don’t understand
I’m
So
confused

Well I guess you wonder why you did it now
So where should I begin?
For starters:
Sometimes it just feels better to give in.
How do you feel knowing that you did the right thing?

I promise.
I can honestly say
Things don’t have to
Be
This
Way

Just Stay!

And you won’t have to be afraid.
The complications aren’t even there if we just take the time to say. . . .
It’ll be okay.
Just promise me this,
day after day so I don’t forget
You were mine in our secret forgotten memory
When the night was our own special getaway.

Consider us broken

She didn’t want to loose me,
Consider the silence broken.
When all I needed was a friend,
She took the sick and made it well again.
When I said I loved her she broke what she saved.
She took back what she gave.
It’s all my fault, I threw it all away.
She wanted me to stay,
but she was lying. I could see it in the way. . .
Her eyelids moved faster than her lips.
When I felt the adrenaline racing through my mind,
I never looked back on what was missing.
What was left behind.
I don’t know if you know this yet,
Or if you even care
But love’s just one of those things. . . .
We’re never going to find!
She’ll never understand anyway so I guess I’m wasting my breath. . . .
wasting my time.
Here are my terms.
All you have to do is sign
Your heart spilled out. . . .
Across the dotted line
I’m standing at her door
Stuffing flowers in her mailbox
I’m curled up on the floor
Our friendship
My heart. . . .
You tore. . . .
Apart.
Consider us broken
Not just for the record.
For so much more.
I didn’t want to loose her,
but it’s too late for last requests.
Goodbye old friend.
Goodbye and goodnight.